When Flamingos Lose Their Pink: Motherhood, Gentle Parenting, and Finding Our Way Back

Flamingos are known for their vibrant pink feathers. But here’s something most people don’t realize: when flamingos become mothers, they lose that pink. The pigments that give them their colour get redirected into producing “crop milk” – the rich nourishment their babies need to survive. Over time, their feathers fade to pale, even white.

But it doesn’t stay that way forever. Once their babies are thriving, the mother flamingo slowly regains her colour, feather by feather, as she rebuilds her own strength.

When I learned this, it felt like someone had put words to my own experience of motherhood. After having three little ones so close together, I know what it feels like to lose pieces of myself. The sleepless nights, the endless laundry, the sticky floors, and the mental load that never seems to shut off – they all added up. Some days, I felt invisible. Other days, I felt frustrated, overstimulated, or just plain exhausted. And honestly? Sometimes I missed the “me” I used to be.

Gentle parenting has taught me that just like my children deserve compassion, so do I. It doesn’t mean I don’t get frustrated – I absolutely do. There are days when I raise my voice, when I crave space, when I wonder how I’ll get through the day. But instead of drowning in guilt, I’m learning to meet myself with gentleness. To recognize that I’m human, not perfect – and that my kids don’t need a perfect mom, they need a loving, real one.

For me, colouring my hair pink has become a symbol of that balance. It’s not just a style choice – it’s a reminder that my colour is still here, even in the messy seasons. It’s me claiming space for myself, even as I give so much to others. It’s permission to show up as both the nurturer *and* the woman who still needs nurturing too.

Self-care doesn’t always look like spa days or bubble baths (though I’ll happily take those when I can). More often, it looks like cracking open a Red Bull for just enough energy to get through the morning, taking five deep breaths in the bathroom when I’m overwhelmed, or forgiving myself when the day didn’t go the way I hoped. These small acts of compassion matter. They’re the tiny ways we feed ourselves so we can keep showing up with love.

Like the flamingo, we may fade in color when we’re giving everything to our children. But with patience, gentleness, and a little self-nurturing, our pink returns. And when it does, it shines even brighter – carrying the strength of everything we’ve been through and the compassion we’ve learned along the way.

So if you’re in a season where you feel faded, tired, or frustrated, know this: you’re not alone. Your colour is not gone – it’s simply resting while you give so much of yourself. And it will return, in new and beautiful ways. 💗

Here are a few small ways to nurture yourself while you’re giving so much to others:

Drink water – it sounds simple, but hydration truly makes a difference.
Move your body – stretch, walk, or dance with your kids in the living room.
Take 5 deep breaths – especially when you feel overwhelmed or overstimulated.
Find a small joy – whether it’s sipping a Red Bull in peace, listening to your favorite song, or lighting a candle.
Let go of the guilt – you are allowed to need space, rest, and care.

Your pink will return, mama – brighter, deeper, and more beautiful than before. 🌸

With love ,

 Jenn